The End | Kathy’s Retirement Blog

This is bittersweet for me as I’ve come to know many of you through my blog.  You’ve communicated how I’ve helped and inspired you over the years as well as offering sound advice.  However, as I prepare to enter 2025 I’m leaving some things behind including Kathysretirementblog.  I thought it fitting to write my final blog post on this final day of 2024.

Why have I made this decision?  Well, you see, I’m happier than I believe I’ve ever been in my life.  Yet, when I sit down to write, it always leads me back to the loss of my husband, Martin, of the beautiful life we had together and our plans for the future.  And, that makes me sad.  It also gives way to writer’s block. There are too many memories written on these pages of the life I no longer have.  

I’ve written a lot about creating a new identity when we enter retirement.  Who are we without our work identity?  How will we fill the void from leaving our career?  The rhetorical questions surface again and again until we fill that space with new activities to define our retirement identity.

During these past two years I’ve been in the process of creating a new identity of who I am without Martin.  The first time I was faced with a form requiring marital status, I blinked a few times at the choices.  It required effort to check the box for widow.  The first time I didn’t put on my wedding rings when I arose in the morning felt strange.  With each little step I took I moved away from grief and toward a life I was carving out for me.  I prefer to think of myself as single.  Recently, I decided I needed the small weight of a ring on my left hand.  So, I started wearing an old ring that once belonged to my mother.  Being in the new house I built was lonely at first.  Then, I began to enjoy the quiet, the peace, the ability to do with it what I alone envisioned.  I learned to be a little selfish.

The moto of this blog is “ Retirement is a journey, not a destination”.  Thinking about Robert Atchley, the gerontologist who defined the six stages of retirement, I took stock of where I am as well as who I am.  There’s a post in the header of this blog about the different stages.  I’m in Stage 4 Reorientation.  Again!  Yes, again.  I realized nothing says we only go through each stage once and only once.  In order to reorient myself, this blog must end.  This part of my journey is complete. 

I’m going to leave the blog on the internet until it’s time for my annual renewal in summer 2025.  I appreciate every one of you and especially those of you who have been with me through many years of this journey.  I send best wishes to each of you as you pursue your own retirement journey.  I will miss you.  Lastly, a new blog may be somewhere in my future.  If so, I hope you will join me again.  

May you have a healthy, happy and peace filled 2025!

Kathy